Monday, May 16, 2011

the semester is over...

So, it's over.  Son2 withdrew from the problem class, and managed to get B or better in his other classes, all studios. I'm proud of him, so proud... this is his best college semester yet... a couple years ago, I didn't know if he should even BE in college.  He should be proud too, he worked really hard for this.

I think he is satisfied with himself for that.  But, he is distracted again, with his relationship with K.  It doesn't sound like she wants to move back in with him.  They have been dating, but living apart.  He doesn't like it.  I think she doesn't want to move back in because she is afraid it will be like it was before, the same codependent thing.  Of course, he promises it won't be, but can I really blame her for not believing him?  I'm guessing she feels responsible, and doesn't think that it's fair.  Well, of course it's not fair.  She is not responsible for his sobriety, and we all know that, but saying it and believing it are different things.  He is losing patience with her, she can't commit, doesn't want to move in, can't even say if she wants to be with him.  I told him, he needs to prove to himself and to her, that he can live his recovery without her, and I don't know how long that will take.  Sad, sad, sad, but he's working on it, and only time will tell.

On a different note, I miss my other son.  Us bloggers, we don't often talk much about our other kids. I saw Son1 on Mother's Day, he brought me flowers and hung out with us and Son2 and K.  We don't see Son1 much, he is busy with his life, his wife, job, friends, etc.  He lives 20 minutes away.  He is independent, isn't that a good thing?  He also doesn't see his brother much, in fact I think they only see each other at family events.  I don't want to think he is ashamed of his brother, but the thought has crossed my mind.

And finally, I'm tired and sick.  I've been putting in some long hours at work on a big project with a lot of stress.  It's finally taken it's toll, and I got sick, sinus infection.  Forced me to stay home today, where I still managed to put a half day's work in.  So, I'm a little whiny, and it's times like this when it's hard to be hopeful about anything.

Actually, I got nothin' to complain about.  Both my boys are doing fine... it's just ME having a bad day.

4 comments:

  1. Bad days come and go...but I like it much better when they go. Hope you feel better soon.

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  2. I will... hope you do too.

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  3. I have son1 and son2 and a daughter. Son2 is the addict and is actively using which he suprisingly admitted last night when we picked him up off the street and allowed him to sleep on our property. Daughter does not want Son2 in the house. As she said last night, "He won't be in our house eating our food and watching our TV will he?" Son1 won't even answer the phone when son2 calls him. Truthfully, I think my two kids that aren't addicts are ashamed of their brother and of their parents. the brother for being an addict and their parents for spending so much time and worry on the addict. Someone said in another blog that I read, "give up on having a normal life" whatever normal is. I have been thinking a lot about that the last few days. I hope that things are improving for you. I didn't mean to ramble. Peace to you for this day.

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  4. My Son1 and Son2 are both adults. It pains me, but I cannot be responsible for their relationship with each other. They are both doing ok, but they may never be close like they were years ago. Thanks for your post, Anonymous, and I wish you well.

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