Thursday, November 22, 2012

IS or WAS?

Son1, Husband, Son2... showing their toughness

A couple of days ago before work I was doing a flyover on POA blogs, starting with my own.  I jumped to Ron's blog and clicked on his link where he had recently written an article.

As I was getting ready to close out and go to work, I noticed something curious.  With the two tabs open in my browser,  the tab for my blog said "My son is an Addict", and the other one from Ron's article said "My son was an Addict".  Both of our sons, about the same age, clean and sober for a couple years or so... what does that mean?

My Son2 says he IS an addict, in the present tense.  My interpretation of that is that, even though he is sober, he fights for it every day.  For me, I am afraid to put it in the past tense, afraid to think that it is really over.  Don't get me wrong, my son is doing well and I am so proud of him.  I guess I have a lot to think about.  Maybe you will see some changes on my blog soon.  BTW, I would love to hear what Ron thinks about this.

It's hard to move forward from the past sometimes for me.  FOUR years ago today, our Son2 came to us with his heroin addiction.  He's home now actually, for Thanksgiving, just like he was then.  Every Thanksgiving since then, I've brought it up with family members, to mark the day and be thankful for how far we've all come.  I don't know if I will this year, maybe I should leave it behind this time.  But, I will still be thinking of it.  Yesterday, I had a text exchange with K, Son2's former girlfriend.  We are still in touch... it's hard to let go of that too.  I told her how thankful I was she was there to share those years with us, and to be part of our family during that time.  She said she would make all the same choices again... and that she has seen Son2 grow and change and can't see him ever going back.  Time for all of us to move on I guess.

So, I give thanks today ...

Happy Thanksgiving to all.